None of us live in a world where only one thing happens in a week. Things come together in time. They may not share any logical connection, or any choice of ours, but in Time — they come together.
Ten years ago Jill and I walked one night and aired our “list of things that had deluged us”. Suicides, deaths, divorces, sickness of a very young child: the usual culprits. We finished. Walked in silence, and I started laughing. We had omitted that my sister was to have a needle biopsy the following morning for breast cancer. Too many things came together, and I forgot to put her on “the list of 65”.
I know, laughing now seems grim, but it helped that night.
Right now I am leveraging our last funds to install our oil field technology on the last well we can afford. Jill’s brother, Steve, drove into Oregon’s hills to try out his new living arrangement — a Ford Expedition — and paint. No one has heard from him in over a week. He who is meticulous about paying everything on time has allowed some things to lapse. A huge norther is blowing in. Jill is finishing the biggest and best art project she has attempted in years. Colt and Claire are expecting baby number two, and pushing out further, so many friends are facing their “First” holidays — without people who died naturally or by their own hand. And OSU stands to beat OU this weekend.
Everything colors everything else.
For Lincoln, the closing days of the war saw him accept Chase’s fourth or fifth resignation, be blue again about his own son’s death in the War, and actually tour the stunning, industrialized devastation of Richmond. Those events colored his days alongside the looming end to the war and defeat of Lee — his first candidate for commander of the Union Army!
We think that becoming a billionaire, marriage, birth, purchase of an opulent house or boat makes someone happy. Everything else in their lives colors those events.
I am nervous and thrilled about being so close to proving the technology and new investor help. My best friend is taking prayer walks in the woods. She fears that she’s saying goodbye to her brother. These came at the same time, strange bedfellows on our calendar, unasked, uninvited, and profoundly antithetical to the other. Yet linked now.
I must remember that what comes linked together in friends’ hearts and calendars all too often inexplicably color their moods, hopes, and thinking.
I can’t take it for granted that a success comes without alien, antithetical mates. Just when I thought Sensitivity for Dummies would make a great book.